Praising your kid a lot and making them believe that they are the best can make them conceited and vain, as reported by a new study. .
A survey of 565 Dutch children aged 7 to 12 was conducted for narcissist tendencies such as superiority and self importance. The children's parents were also questioned on the way they praise their infants.
Narcissistics believe themselves to be the best, live for personal success and expect special treatment from others. When they face failure they do not accept it sportingly and can even turn violent
It was found that the children whose parent always praised them and told them that they were greater and superior than other kids scored higher on narcissism in contrast with the children who were given a reasonable and more realistic review of themselves. Brad Bushman, a professor of communication and psychology at Ohio State University and one of the study's authors explained that due to over-praising the children tend to think that they are someone special and expects special treatment from everyone every time.
"Parents should be warm and loving, but not give their child blanket praise," Bushman said. "We should not boost self-esteem and hope our children will behave well. Instead, we should praise our children after they do well."
Dr. Gene Beresin, the executive director of Massachusetts General Hospital's Clay Center for Young Healthy Minds, said he doubted some of the study's conclusions.
"In the first place, parents are just one influence on a child," he said. "Teachers, peers, siblings and many others influence how a child feels about themselves and how they behave towards others."
Beresin stated that American children differ from Dutch children. But the age of the children surveyed in the study concerned him the most
"I don't see how you can label kids this young as narcissistic when it's generally recognized that such personality traits aren't fully formed until late adolescence, like around age 18," he said.
Beresin stated that parents who provide their children honest feedback along with help and encouragement build their children's self-esteem. Positive feedback must be given as long as the child deserves it as it helps the child to work harder and increase his self-importance.
