The Psychology of De-Escalation: Understanding Aggressive Behavior and How to Stop It

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Understanding aggressive behavior and knowing how to de-escalate tense situations are crucial for promoting safety and resolving conflicts. According to Pollack Peacebuilding, de-escalation training can foster the necessary skills for managers, leaders, supervisors, and employees to prevent workplace conflicts from escalating and workplace violence from occurring. Here are some key points to consider:

Recognize the Signs but Remain Calm

Aggressive behavior can manifest in various ways, including:

  • Verbal aggression (yelling, insults);

  • Physical aggression (threats, violence); or

  • Passive-aggressive behavior (sarcasm, manipulation).

Although aggressive behavior might foreshadow a potentially dangerous situation, it is not always so if adequately mitigated. The advantage of this emotional state is that the signs are evident and easy to spot. It's essential to recognize the signs of aggression early to intervene efficiently.

When faced with aggression, it's crucial to remain calm. Aggressive behavior can be contagious, and responding with anger or aggression may escalate the situation further. This is why it is essential to maintain a composed demeanor, take deep breaths, and regulate your own emotions.

Active Listening

Many aggressive clients or colleagues express themselves because they feel mistreated and do not receive attention. This is only sometimes the case, but practicing active listening by giving the person your full attention can go a long way, no matter the reason behind their outburst.

Maintain eye contact, use nonverbal cues to show interest and understanding, and refrain from interrupting or dismissing their concerns. Demonstrating that you genuinely listen can help defuse their anger and make them feel heard.

Empathy and Understanding

When dealing with aggressive individuals, it is essential to try and understand the underlying reasons for their aggression. Empathize with their behavior, acknowledge their feelings, and show compassion, which can help de-escalate the situation and open up avenues for resolution.

Use Non-Threatening Body Language and Maintain Respectful Communication

When dealing with aggressive behavior, it is essential to pay attention to your own body language since it will influence the situation. Maintain an open posture, keep a comfortable distance, and avoid crossing your arms or displaying aggressive or non-attentive gestures.

Non-threatening body language can help create a sense of safety and reduce defensiveness, allowing the aggressive person to open up, which is why you should also appear to give them your undivided attention.

Speak calmly and respectfully, using non-confrontational language, and avoid personal attacks, blame, or criticism. These actions can quickly escalate the aggression. Instead, focus on the issue and express your thoughts and concerns assertively yet respectfully.

Offer Solutions and Options

When appropriate, engage in problem-solving and offer potential solutions. Collaboratively explore alternatives and find common ground. By involving the other person in finding a resolution, you empower them and reduce feelings of hostility.

Although de-escalation techniques work in many situations, it is important to maintain ongoing training and seek professional help. De-escalation trainers can help you boost your communication, active listening, empathy, and other critical skills to help you deal with aggressive behavior at work or in other life situations.

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