How to Live Longer: Resolve Arguments Before the Day's End

A piece of old marriage advice says not to go to bed angry because it is a toxic pattern that causes long-term damage. This has been scientifically proven wherein a study reveals that resolving arguments before the day's end could improve one's health.

A team of researchers from Oregon State University found that people who resolve an argument before sleeping would not feel the negative effects of that argument the next day. It is because the negative emotions associated with the argument if reduced or eliminated once it is resolved.

The study, entitled "Resolution Status and Age as Moderators for Interpersonal Everyday Stress and Stressor-Related Affect" and published in the Journals of Gerontology, also found that older people are more likely to resolve arguments to avoid them and do not allow emotional response to continue the following day.

 Resolving Arguments Before the Day's End Promotes Long Life, Study
Resolving Arguments Before the Day's End Promotes Long Life, Study Pexels

Resolving Arguments Is Good For the Health

People can suppress negative memories, but holding on to these thoughts for so long can increase stress levels that could significantly impact one's overall health.

"Everyone experiences stress in their daily lives," according to study senior author Robert Stawski, an associate professor in the College of Public Health and Human Services. "You aren't going to stop stressful things from happening."

He added that tying negative emotions off and bringing them to an end by resolving them will benefit a person's well-being. It is important to resolve arguments to maintain well-being in daily life.

Their study surveyed 2,022 participants from ages 33 to 84 and interviewed them about their experiences for eight days.

They also analyzed reports from participants about arguments and avoided arguments that started disagreement but chose to let it go. Then, they identified how the person affected them both on the day of the argument and the day of the change in negative and positive emotions occurred.

The results suggest that people who felt their argument was resolved reported roughly half the reactivity compared to those unresolved conflicts, MailOnline reported

Moreover, people who felt the argument was resolved showed no prolonged elevation of their negative affect the next day. The study also showed that older participants were 40% more likely to resolve conflicts than those younger people of ages 45 and below.


Tips to Resolve Conflicts

Conflicts are part of life and being in a relationship. But that does not mean that you will let conflicts jeopardize your relationships. Recognizing conflicts and working through them strengthens relationships. When conflicts in relationships arise, there are some tips to resolve them together, according to Very Well Mind.

First, start using more "I" statements and specifically state your concerns. In that way, you could both move on to the unified "we" and solve your conflicts.

Second, be respectful and kind. Stay aware of how you are feeling as you are speaking because you might be tensing up and your voice becomes aggressive. By this time, stop and take a breath, and remember not to call your partner names because it might cause more conflicts.

Lastly, listen to understand. During an argument, it is important to know how your partner feels and why they feel that way. Being an active listener is valuable when trying to find a solution to a problem together.


Check out more news and information on Psychology and Relationships at Science Times.

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